I posted Friday to look for a post on Monday about taking care of the care giver….
I went to write it about 10 times yesterday and I just couldn’t. I couldn’t think of anything to say. Mostly it was because I was completely exhausted and burned out myself and it was only Monday. I felt like I had no advice to give when I was drowning myself. Know what I mean?
Like I said Monday, as women we are usually the caregivers in our families for our children, parents, siblings and friends. Most of us don’t have the luxury of hiring help for everything that we dont’ want to do or have time to do. On TV we see stressed stars exclaim they need a break and head off for some “girl time” or a manicure and facial on a regular basis. Not in my house is that going to happen! That would require a babysitter, time and money. None of which I have much of, or am willing to spend on a manicure Now a 5 hour nap I would consider selling my soul for but trying to catch up after that 5 hours just isn’t worth it!
How can you keep your buckets full so that you can continue being the caregiver?
A very wise friend of mine called yesterday, a little unexpected, but just at the right time (amazing how that happens huh?) and very matter of fact said, “YOU need to figure out how to keep YOUR bucket full.” It was great advice and I was happy I answered the phone… because if you have called me in the past 3 years you might have noticed I don’t answer the phone anymore. One way I have tried to deal with stress.
Here are some comments from the Friday post:
From Lindsay C – Only tip I have is to breathe. (not a very good tip) I guess I just try to come up with the conclusion that THIS is how it’s going to be. So I might as well try to live with it the best I can. I also try to realize that their are others far off worse than myself. I only have my husband and our 2 toddlers to take care of. So it’s not like I’m a caregiver of 7 KIDS
I quit smoking last July, got bronchitis which turned to pnuemonia, so it’s been harder to release my stress.
From Allyson - I care for my husband, who has several serious conditions. I do best when we can spend time together doing things that have nothing to do with his health. It creates a balance when I can interact with him as a person and not think about the illness.
From Janelle – 55 Ways to take care of yourself.
First, Lindsay, I was more stressed and a mess when I had 2 kids. It doesn’t matter how many kids you have, your life, fatigue, stress etc. is just as real as if you had 10 kids. Having 7 kids is much easier than having 2 I promise! Allyson, I can’t imagine having to care for a spouse, how difficult that must be. That last sentence you wrote is beautiful.
I am also one to just breath. When things get hard, I am most likely to put my head down and press on. But at some point you will hit a wall if you are not looking where you are going and slow down. It might be years down the road but you will.
What are some frugal ways you can recharge your batteries?
- Join a gym (use the 30 day free trials most offer)
- Take a walk (* I do this a LOT when I have a new baby)
- Make cookies ( My hips suggested this one, apparently it works)
- Read a magazine ( I have done this with screaming and complaining children hanging on me, I just ignored them for 20 minutes and felt better)
- Take a shower
- Call a friend
- Get out of the house (go ANYWHERE!)
- Take a drive
- Make a list of your blessings
- Read your scriputers
- Sign up for a class
- Hire someone to help clean your home
- Learn to say “no” to things that take up time that cause more stress
- Keep a journal or start a blog so you can write
If we can’t keep our “buckets full” we can’t take care of those who are counting on us. I would love to hear what YOU do and would love some advice as well!